Building Your Network As An Introvert
I don't consider building a network something that comes easily to me. First, I'm a diehard introvert. I enjoy spending time alone. It's not that I don't like people. As an introvert, I recharge by spending time by myself. There is also a level of discomfort inherent in meeting new people. I never know what to say until I've spent time getting to know someone. As an introvert, I truly hate small talk so I need to have a conversation that goes beyond the surface.
All that said, I've found over time that I can learn to go beyond the surface quickly by building on a shared connection. And, those shared connections come more easily when you expand your network. So, while it is counter intuitive in some ways, building more connections with people actually makes life easier as an introvert.
When a colleague asked me the other day how I've built my network I thought I'd work out some of my thoughts here to share with everyone.
Say Yes where you're most comfortable. For an introvert, conversation is all about connection. So, for me, figuring out where I'm most comfortable with the content and the topic of the work made it easier to figure out what I would be truly comfortable putting myself out there one and where I'd still feel really uncomfortable. This led to several new opportunities and the ability to make much, much deeper connections with people I only tangentially knew prior to these efforts.
Have coffee or an after work cocktail. This has probably been the biggest game changing strategy for me over the last few years. The incredibly simple act of meeting someone for coffee and building a connection with them is actually very comfortable. In a 30 - 60 minute coffee conversation, I can ask lots of questions and learn about thee other person - and most people enjoy talking about themselves. From that one conversation I have a wealth of connections I can build on with that person in future activities.
Continuously scan your own talent radar. If you're in a position where you're going to be hiring other people, continuously scan your world for talent you might like to hire. At least for me, the act of hiring others has never felt all that uncomfortable to me and helping to mentor and coach others has been something I've enjoyed - even as an introvert. Maybe this is unique to my personality but having a conversation with someone about what their dreams and goals are and trying to help them make connections is really something I enjoy - and it builds your network and the other persons at the same time.
Use your side hustle. I know very few people who don't have a side hustle nowadays, although if you don't know what a side hustle is, I highly recommend the Chris Gillebeau podcast and platform Side Hustle School. Whether you think of it as a formal side hustle or just a passion project doesn't really matter as long as it helps you build a network of other people.
Ask people you trust to connect you to other like minded people. Extroverts don't really understand why we introverts don't know absolutely everyone in the local restaurant or every name they drop in conversation. That said, when you say, "Who is that?" or "I don't know who that is. Could you tell me about them?" they are very likely to not only tell you about them but give you some small nugget of information on which you can build your own connection with that person. Don't get me wrong. I employ Google and LinkedIn quite regularly to answer my "Who is that?" questions. But I do have a few people that I now trust to tell me more about a person as well as to simply introduce me to people they think I might like.
As an introvert, what strategies do you use to build your network?